November 10, 2012 · 2 Comments
Can you hear the sound? Sort of like the cicadas of late summer, but human? A low, keening whine? I’ve identified it. It’s the right wing of the American political spectrum. They’re misunderstanding why President Barack Obama won a second term.
Let’s look at one well-known right wing pundit and his take on why that happened.
He did it with a coalition of liberals who had no problem ignoring the nation’s economic reality; with Americans who don’t believe they can make it on their own so they embrace the nanny state; and he won because his faithful followers don’t even see him as a politician. To them, he is, as Brent Stephens put it in the Wall Street Journal, “our first cult-of-personality president.”
This result is what I described yesterday as an absorbing state where voters feel like they can’t feed themselves unless they vote for Democrats who promise them government help. This limits opportunities for Conservatism and forces the nation on a train-track to fiscal and moral bankruptcy. This pernicious feedback loop can be countered in two ways. We blow it up (I’ll discuss how to light the fuse in my next post in this series) or we slow it down until we bleed off enough energy to make it stop.
Oh, my weeping babies! Your philosophy has been REJECTED! AGAIN! We don’t WANT a government small enough to drown in a bathtub. We want, and voted for, a government that stays out of our bedrooms and reproductive choices, but spends money on the things we want, like roads, bridges, broadband, green energy, and things that are GOOD for all Amercians. EVEN YOU!
But fear not, my keening right wing friends! Your Jovial Editor at the Patriot-Ombudsman has all the answers for you. Here’s a simple way you can have the kind of government you want and never, ever have to worry about being bitch-slapped by Democrats again!
And I am not talking about “secession.” I speak of “expulsion.” I think the President needs to work with Democrats in congress to find SOME way to kick several states OUT of the United States. They are the states shown in red in the above map.
Want to talk about “makers vs. takers”? All the whining comes up empty when you see the facts. People in the RED states TAKE more than they GIVE in federal taxes! These red states TAKE over $495 million each year in Federal Taxes, and they give back about $384 million. That averages to a deficit of $8,891.34 PER PERSON in these states, taking more than they give!
Once Congress figures out a way to do it, these red states get the boot on January 1 of the following year. The United States Government will pay for the relocation to a Blue state of any citizen who applies. We will close every federal institution and military installation in these red states. That includes, four Marine bases, 14 Navy bases, 29 Air Force bases, and 55 Army bases. We stop all Federal Funding to highway projects in these states. In fact, we stop ALL federal funding to these states. These are the states that have been the loudest complainers about federal spending. but out of the states that we are going to forcibly expel from the US, only Texas, Arkansas, North Carolina and Georgia have a positive per capita contribution to the treasury.
We’ll miss you guys.
Now, you will see on the map a bunch of pink states. These states will have an opportunity to hold a referendum on whether or not they wish to remain in the United States. They will hold their referendums in April, and if they vote to leave the Union, they will be taken off the flag the following January 1. These states, however, must pay for the relocation of any residents that wish to relocate. And we will keep, by force if necessary, United States military bases in their territories. No funding for Federal projects, highways, infrastructure, anything like it that does not have to do or otherwise benefit the assets we leave behind in your new country. They will get the kind of government they want, we will have the kid of government WE want, and EVERYBODY will be HAPPY!
Look at the savings!
Since the Red States have a deficit of tax revenue received to tax revenue returned to the treasury, we save about $111 million a year! If the pink states all decide to go, we save $44 million a year!
THERE IS NO DOWNSIDE TO THIS PLAN!!!
Look at these graphics!
Seriously. It’s a win-win! We get rid of the whiners and have the progressive government WE want, they don’t have to have a NEE-GROW for a president any more, and can have the kind of government THEY want. When you look at the FACTS, you have to get to #20 before you find a state that actually GIVES more to the treasury than it takes. And of the states that TAKE more than they GIVE, 21 of them are either Red or Pink on the map. So, let them go. No more juice from Uncle Sam. No loans. No funds. No military bases. No air traffic control. No airport maintenance. No funding of police, first responders, teachers. Nothing. You get NOTHING!
Then, in 10 years, we go back in with troops and bulldozers, raze everything they let fall to pieces, round up the survivors, and reclaim the territories!
Why has no one thought of this before?
Tags: barack obama, bernard goldberg, cicadas, conservatism, cult of personality, economic reality, faithful followers, feedback loop, man jack, moral bankruptcy, nanny state, political spectrum, red states, repair man, secession, second term, sound sort, train track, wall street journal, whine